At The Bristal, leading with heart begins with understanding each resident as an individual. In Reflections memory care, that means recognizing the person beyond the diagnosis, paying attention to the small details that bring comfort, and helping team members provide care with patience and understanding.
Shaniqua Hayes, Director of Reflections at The Bristal at Bethpage, exemplifies this approach. Since joining The Bristal at Lynbrook in 2005, she has advanced through supervisor and coordinator roles and served as Director of Wellness, building firsthand experience that continues to shape how she supports residents, families, and her team today.
“Once I started working with seniors, there was no looking back,” she recalls. “The joy I felt within me seeing them happy and appreciative just made me want to do and learn more.”
That commitment to understanding residents as individuals is at the heart of how Shaniqua cares for them, supports families, and leads her team members. As Erika, Regional Director of Healthcare, observes, Shaniqua has a particular ability to step into a resident’s world rather than expecting the resident to step into hers. Whether brightening someone’s day with a little shimmy or offering reassurance through a comforting touch, she recognizes that meaningful connection looks different for everyone.
Meeting Residents Where They Are
For Shaniqua, some of the most meaningful moments of her work happen in the everyday interactions that make residents feel known and valued.
They might take place during a beauty day in the salon, while making jewelry together, while helping a resident shave, or while sitting down for a conversation about life’s lessons. Sometimes, a song or a short walk is all it takes to brighten someone’s day.
“She has this way of stepping into the resident’s world versus trying to get them to come into ours,” Erika says. “And she does with such ease.”
These everyday interactions reflect an important principle of memory care at The Bristal: meaningful connection begins with meeting the individual where they are. There is no single approach that works for everyone. Connecting with residents requires paying attention to the person in front of you and recognizing what might help that individual feel comfortable, engaged, or reassured.
Mark Paretti, Vice President of Resident Experience, recently witnessed this approach firsthand. While speaking with Shaniqua in her office, they noticed a resident trying to find the dining room and pushing the wrong door. Rather than calling someone else to assist, Shaniqua got up without hesitation, approached the resident, and escorted her to her table, before returning to the conversation.
That instinct to respond is an important part of leading in Reflections. Beyond coordinating care and supporting team members, these leaders help identify unmet needs, understand changes in residents’ behavior, and guide their teams toward responses that are meaningful and personal. The goal is not simply to address a challenge, but to understand what may be behind it and help each resident continue to experience dignity, purpose, and connection.
Shaniqua puts that philosophy into practice every day, and her influence can be seen in the way her team approaches residents with the same patience and understanding.
The Comfort of Knowing
Building trust with families is another important part of Shaniqua’s role. When families entrust someone’s care to The Bristal, they are also navigating uncertainty and learning how to understand a changing relationship with someone they love.
Shaniqua believes that being present makes a difference.
“When families are visiting, they see me involved,” she explains. “They see their loved one light up when I’m around.”
Loredana, Lifestyle Director at The Bristal at Bethpage, has seen how Shaniqua makes herself available to residents when they need extra reassurance. “Her door is always open to them. If they are having a particularly bad day, she will invite them to sit with her and speak… She makes them feel seen.”
That same compassion extends to the families making decisions about Reflections memory care. With more than 25 years of caregiving experience, Shaniqua brings knowledge and perspective to what can be an emotional transition. Sara Anne, Director of Community Relations at The Bristal at Bethpage, sees how Shaniqua puts those qualities into practice, making a point of stopping to connect whenever she sees her speaking with a prospective resident or family member.
“Her experience, compassion, and ability to put families at ease demonstrate the importance of leading with both knowledge and heart,” Sara Anne says.
For Shaniqua, that reassurance is one of the most important outcomes of her work. One resident approaching her 95th birthday has become a particularly meaningful example. Although the resident, who is legally blind, sometimes has difficulty recalling her children’s names, she consistently remembers Shaniqua’s. The resident’s family shares in the delight of these moments, finding comfort in the connection Shaniqua has built with their loved one and the knowledge that she is in good hands at The Bristal.
In Reflections, supporting families means helping them recognize the relationships, attention, and understanding their loved ones receive each day. This combination of understanding residents’ needs and providing genuine care is central to The Bristal Experience, helping families feel supported through difficult transitions.
Leading by Example
Shaniqua’s approach to residents also shapes how she leads her team.
“I coach all staff to do all things from the heart,” she says. “Residents can truly feel a genuine love. We should treat all residents and families as if they are our own loved ones.”
It is advice she reinforces not only through what she tells her colleagues, but through what they see her do.
Evamarie, Director of Dining Services at The Bristal at Bethpage, has seen that approach firsthand. When Shaniqua is with her Reflections residents, Evamarie says, the neighborhood fills with smiles and laughter as Shaniqua sings and dances with them, making each person feel special.
Her care extends to the finer details, too. Before holiday events when families come together to celebrate, Shaniqua takes on the role of the Reflections neighborhood’s unofficial Glam Squad, doing residents’ hair, makeup, and nails so they look and feel their best for the special occasion.
These moments offer more than an opportunity to get ready for a celebration. They create time for personal connection, gentle touch, and one-on-one attention. At The Bristal, understanding residents as individuals means making room for preferences, routines, and familiar experiences that help them feel like themselves.
Shaniqua’s leadership extends beyond her daily interactions with residents. Loredana recalls how she spearheaded a bake sale to raise awareness and donations for the Walk to End Alzheimer’s. She rallied team members to contribute baked goods, came in on her day off to bake for the cause, and made the event a fun, shared effort. Together, the team raised nearly $700, bringing colleagues together around a cause that holds significant meaning for the larger memory care community.
Evamarie has also witnessed Shaniqua’s compassion in more difficult moments, like when a resident is having a difficult day and Shaniqua recognizes what they need even when others may not yet understand. That ability to look beyond words and respond to the individual is an important aspect of Reflections memory care at The Bristal, and it’s something her colleagues learn from watching her in action.
As Erika observes, Shaniqua’s team members then begin to mirror her behavior, seeking to build the same kinds of relationships with residents and expressing genuine pride when they find those connections.
Evamarie describes Shaniqua as a supportive and thoughtful colleague who has stood by her in good times and bad. Through their friendship and work together, Evamarie says, she has learned a great deal about memory care, including questions to ask when considering care for her own parents. “Shaniqua has been an absolute blessing to me,” she says.
Mark sees this as one of the strengths of leaders who have grown within The Bristal. Team members can learn from someone who understands the challenges they face because that leader has experience similar responsibilities firsthand.
“There is a different level of connection when team members know that the person leading them has stood in nearly the same place they stand today,” Mark explains.
Leaders who have worked directly with residents draw on that firsthand knowledge to support their teams, recognize challenges, and help colleagues develop their own skills. Through everyday interactions, leaders at The Bristal help make those values part of the broader culture.
The Impact of Leading with Heart
When Shaniqua reflects on what residents and families have taught her, she returns to the importance of being present.
“They have taught me to take one minute at a time. Live in the moment.”
That perspective speaks to the nature of Reflections memory care, where interactions do not have to be elaborate to be meaningful. A familiar face, a shared laugh, a favorite song, or the reassurance of knowing someone will be there when needed can make a world of difference in a resident’s day.
These moments also reflect an important principle of The Bristal Experience: every resident deserves to be understood as an individual. Providing thoughtful care means looking beyond what is immediately apparent, recognizing personal preferences and unmet needs, and finding ways to preserve dignity, foster community, and cultivate a sense of purpose, even as needs change.
That commitment extends to families, who deserve clear communication, compassion, and confidence in the people to whom they’ve entrusted their loved one. It extends to team members, too, through leaders who share their knowledge, model meaningful engagement, and help others continue to grow in their roles.
Shaniqua’s story offers one example of what these values look like in practice. Across Reflections neighborhoods, the goal is to build a culture in which residents are known, families feel supported, and every team member understands the difference genuine connection can make.
Leading with heart is not a personal quality. It is a commitment to how care is delivered, how team members are supported, and how every resident is treated.
